the world beyond your home

'Mummy, this world is too frightening for me... Can I just go back home and be there under your watch?'
I remembered when I first stepped out from my parent's house to stay in Yogya. My daddy drove the car filled with my stuffs. Mummy was beside him, being a navigator as usual. And I was sitting at the passenger's seat along with all the boxes. The ride took around 1.5 hours. The longest hours for me at that time.
I was a rebel girl. Through my high school years, I never agreed a single thing my Mum said. I slam the door right at my Daddy's face. It wasn't something that I'm proud of. I use to think that I'm better than they were. That they weren't proud enough with all of my achievements. My selfish thoughts.
And that 1.5 hours ride, I thought it was my freedom way. And Yogya was my freedom gate. Finally, I have a space for my own.
My Daddy dropped my stuffs and arrange them up for me in my new room. My Mummy tried to touch my head or my hand, which I completely ignored. I was too excited picturing the life I would have without listening to my Mum being chatty or my Daddy in his silence.
By the moment they were ready to go, my Daddy hugged me, gave me a kiss, and pat my head and my Mummy said, 'I am leaving this trust with you, we believe that you wouldn't let us down. We won't be like other parents who checked their kids 24/7 because we know, you could take care of yourself. Just think before you act, because you are our only daughter'
By that time, I have no idea about the things my Mummy said. I don't have a clue for the things my Daddy did. I was only 17, and acted like I was 5.
Now, 6 years have passed me by. I've traveled to so many different places. I've met so many different person. I've been through so many different conditions. And I haven't finished this journey of mine.
But now, I understand the words that my Mum said was a big thing. She didn't gave me money, gadgets, or anything else, but she gave me her trust. I have the right to choose everything on my own with my parent's full support, because they knew I would not let them down. Now I know that not all parents gave their daughter, their only daughter the chance to be away from them. Not to mention of being a Javanese. Now I know how hard it is for them to let me go, let me step out from the house.
Now I understand, my Daddy's gestures was the way to say that 'you are my precious' to me. My Daddy never talked much. He never complained the things I did. He was always there when I did my stupidity. Watch me and make sure that I could get up after my fall. I have to admit, it was him who I turn to when I met my dead end. After I talked to my Mummy.
It took me 5 years to realize and 1 year to understand. I am still trying to understand as I live my life at the moment. How lucky I am to have them as my parents. They may not be the best parents I've ever met, but for me, they're perfect.
Today, I won't be ashamed of holding your hands, or bringing your stuffs, or introducing you to my friends, or saying how much I love you. Because I won't let you two down.
so, hugs and kisses, I love you.

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Tikki Mahayanti
hmm, King, I haven't decide about you yet... ahahaha... I guess I love you too, King! =p
*awh, writing this post brings up memories for me... hmmm... I need tissues here..*